Not so close but same blood flows in our vains
Published on HivePostify by @corneliusoke · Thu Sep 03 2026
Family is the basic unit of life, and the extended family is also a very important part of every family. Uncles and aunts play a crucial role in connecting us to our roots in many cultures.
In some cultures, when a person dies, it becomes the duty of their siblings to pass on the traditions of the people to the deceased's children. If those children are not on good terms with their extended family, this can become a real issue — even if they have the money to handle the burial themselves. It often leads to unnecessary spending, simply because they lack the guidance of the people who would have shown them the right way to do things.
This can also affect children when it's time for them to marry. For example, in some traditions, a girl may be given away in marriage by her father's brother or her mother's brother, depending on the customs of the people. And beyond specific situations like death or marriage, the relationship between parents and their siblings tends to reflect in the relationship their children go on to have with those same aunts and uncles.
Many people have moved from their communities to the cities, and this has affected their relationships with siblings who stayed behind in the hometown — which, in turn, affects how their children relate to those uncles and aunts.
Personally, I'd say my relationship with my uncles isn't bad, but it isn't great either. Growing up, I knew almost all my mum's siblings, since they lived in the same city where I was born and raised — so I either visited them occasionally or they visited us.
I can't say the same for my dad's siblings, since they lived in other cities, and some were in the village, which I only visited occasionally. Still, I wouldn't call the relationship bad. I have met some of them, though honestly, I might walk right past a few on the street today, since the last time I saw them I was still quite small.
Social media has actually made it easier to keep up with some of them. But even though we're related by blood one way or another, we're not all headed in the same direction, and some of us hold entirely different values and faith.
In the past, I've had to reach out to some of my uncles when I needed help getting documentation from my local government. So while we aren't especially close, we still know we're family, and when there's a need, we show up for each other.
Even though I've left my state of origin, there are uncles and aunts I make a point of visiting whenever I'm back home — because some of them have helped me in the past, and others have simply been a source of encouragement, a presence I could count on when I needed it. That's what family does.
So we may not be close, but we know we're family. And as long as you're not doing anything to hurt me, my parents, or my siblings, we're good.
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